The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize