I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
We are two peas in an std pod
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
