i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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