this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
