YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
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