My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
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