So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Randomize