You're my little dorito
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
