can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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