We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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