he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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