i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Someone signed my nipple.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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