HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
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