I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
