Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
