Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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