He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
