My hand turned me down
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
