cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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