good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize