I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
