The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
