Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
