I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
