in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
is wine microwaveable?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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