he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
