You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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