sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize