i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
