is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm passing your future prison.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
