I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
