New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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