You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
