She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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