Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
