How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
