Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
And then he peed in my hair
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