come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
