i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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