Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
