its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize
