we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
