is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
