the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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