I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
