if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
