if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
there is glitter all over my balls
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
