i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize