don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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