READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize